I have always envied those who are able to stand up & say kind words about their loved ones & how they feel & still make it through to the end with composure in place.   I may be able to hold a hard tough shield at times but this is much different.  Mom, I hope you understand why I was unable to stand up & read this for you. 

If I were to list all the great & wonderful things about our Mom, we would not be leaving here today.  How can one put close to 83 years of such a wonderful lady into a few lines, in a only a few minutes?   It cannot be done. 

As a kid, I remember truly & whole heartedly believing that I had the best parents in the world.  I still feel the same way today.  I often wondered how all the other kids must feel.  Why were they short taken & why were we so lucky?  I considered myself lucky & enjoyed my kid life, even through the bumps, ups & downs.

 In my young mind, those bumps, high & lows could not have been planned, never a mistake nor a failure on anyone's part.  It must have been a glitch with no one to blame.   I now understand that all those great parents out there are not perfect.  They try their absolute best doing what they feel is the right thing to do or make that prefect decision, then when all is said & done, it just works out.  There isn't a manual to read or a school to teach them, just the test of life to pass.  Our Mom was put to the test many times, through four kids.  If you were to do the math, she had seventy plus years experience so, I suppose that makes her an expert after all.

Our Mom was the youngest of her siblings, raised by a loving Dad who like our Mom, tried his best.  Our grandmother for whatever reason, left Grandfather alone to raise his kids when our Mom was only five.  

As hard as those times were, the family had each other & a huge amount of love according to the stories Mom told. 

Mom loved to tell her stories to us kids about when she herself was young like us.  I have just one I'd like to share that I don't believe Mom ever told us herself.  If memory serves me well it was my uncle Russell who wrote about this one not too many years ago.  It stuck in my mind much like those Mom told over the years.  This short story shows the love that a man had for his kids & why our Mom was much the same.

Working as a logger on his own with an axe, hand saws & a horse, our grandfather went each day to make money to care for his family.  The family had many hard times with very little money, still they had each other.   

Mom's older sister Patricia (Auntie Pat) was about 12 at the time.  She was left to care for the kids during the day while Grandfather worked.  One day while Grandfather was in town, he was told by someone that they had news about the government coming to visit to take the kids away since he was, in their eyes, not providing well for his family by leaving them with the older sister while he worked.  He knew he had to do something but he also knew he was not letting his kids go.  I believe it was the next day the authorities were to visit.

Grandfather stayed home from logging the next day.  Grandfather sat on the front steps of their tiny home waiting for the visitors to arrive.  The house was small & sat far back in the trees somewhere in the area of Apsley in the township of Peterborough. 

Keep in mind,  days were different back in 1937.  Eventually the car came up the drive & turned to where Grandfather could be seen sitting on the steps.   The car stopped & as the doors opened & the officials got out of the car, Grandfather stood up with his shotgun in hand.  He told the people standing outside the car that he needed time to arrange for someone to take care of the kids & that he was not about to let them be taken away.  I suppose they understood, plus they were not given a choice.  The doors closed & the car left.  Grandfather did what he had to do & what he felt was right.  That was his perfect decision.

Our Mom was much the same & I saw this a few times throughout my life.   I feel sorry for anyone who crossed Mom's path when it came to her families care or well being. 

Most times Mom was like a soft kitten.   If anyone were to do anything  wrong to her family, the mother lion came out.  In fact, thinking back over time I can't remember anyone who crossed that line with Mom & did not back down.  They too, had no choice.  She was small, loving, determined & mighty.

I only knew her as a Mom.   In her younger days when beginning a family, being a homemaker & Mom was the norm & I for one feel she was the best that anyone could ask for.  Her family always came first, no questions asked. 

Mom had no choice but to grow up fast.  She & Dad married & Mom became a mother at a time when she herself, should have still been learning about what life had yet to offer.  Instead she left the quiet country life she grew up with & entered into the big city to begin a family. 

Quite a change for a young lady, even more so without a mother to guide or give her words of wisdom.  Luckily she had two other wonderful women to lean on & share life with.  Her big sister Pat & her lifelong friend Marg. 

Throughout her life she did what she enjoyed the most.  Take care of the ones she loved.  It was what she did.  I don't remember a time when Mom put herself first & that was because, she never did.  As time went by & her kids grew just a little older, she was able to enjoy a bit of her own time.  She filled some of that time with her art work, a great talent that came natural for her.  She had what I always believed, was a voice of a professional singer.  She was invited to sing in church for as long as I can remember.  She sang at home for the simple fun of it.  Dad loved to lay down & close his eyes wile Mom sang to him.  That is a nice memory.

Mom had a talent for baking great things too.  They were so good even a few restaurants kept her busy for a while.  Cakes, cookies & loaves of bread she did it all from scratch.   She was happy to know she was doing good for others, if only to make someone smile or laugh, or to fill their belly with what she had made.  It was just her way, simple & beautiful.

Others have passed on leaving  their mark in the world of business, or because of some great event they may have created or been a part of.  Our Mom left her mark in our hearts & what a huge & massive mark it is.  She was one of the most wonderful & caring people I have known, not because she's my Mom, because she was.  I am so thankful to be her son & to have been the one she sat with so many times to ease my mind of what was bothering me or to help me understand what I was going through.  Her kind words of wisdom both amazed me & helped me through some difficult times.  To this day, I still don't know how she did it, how she was able to help so much with only words.  It must have been the love she gave as well.  This too was a natural talent, a blessing given to her that was thoughtfully passed on to the ones she loved.  I know that blessing she had was not reserved just for me although she sure made it feel that way.  Yet another part of her being that special lady.

Mom has spread her love over so many people in her life & she would have given more if given the time.  I hope she understood how much I appreciated her & how even the tiny things meant so much to me.  When I think back now, there were so many.  I remember even the tiniest things that showed such incredible love & care.  I still feel she is the best Mom in the world, truly I do.  No one could have done more or tried harder.

For those who have been fortunate enough to have her there for them too, you know what I mean.  You will know without my telling you how great she was, how big her heart was & what a loving & forgiving person she was.

I still need her to guide me at times.  Now I'll think to myself, what would Mom say & that...., will be the best & perfect answer.  She has not left us, only began to rest.  She will always be there for her family,  just like she has always been.  Now we just have to listen a little closer for her caring words. 

Mom, there is no way I could thank you enough for being such a great mother & always being there for me.

I love you so very much & I'll miss you forever.  You will never leave my heart.

Your boy, Lorne.